


From my Lungs

by SaltedSaltine (EliPot)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura & Lance - Freeform, Hanahaki Disease, Kolivan & Keith, Krolia & Keith - Freeform, Lotor & Lance - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-04-23 22:16:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14342076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EliPot/pseuds/SaltedSaltine
Summary: When I was a child I learned that my family was cursed. We were cursed to die a slow, painful, morbidly beautiful death for loving those who didn’t love us back. Flowers would grow from our lungs and bloom from our mouths.





	1. 1

 

 

When I was a child I learned that my family was cursed. We were cursed to die a slow, painful, morbidly beautiful death for loving those who didn’t love us back. Flowers would grow from our lungs and bloom from our mouths.

  
And of course it would be fate to curse the family of those who love too much for their own good. My mom raised my siblings and me to always be careful with our hearts. Don’t give it to anyone you don’t know would give you theirs, she would say. Do not let your emotions run so far from you that you lose your life, Lancito. You could say that I took it to heart.

  
Which is why Keith is dangerous.

 

 

\--

 

 

       Swordfighting wasn’t all that complicated once Lance got the hang of it. Each stance and movement had him stumbling at first, but he was nothing if not adaptable. Although, slicing up ball-droids was much easier than sparring with an actual gladiator; he’d fallen on his ass enough to feel numb before calling out, “End training sequence!” and dropping to the floor.

 

       He promptly sprawled. _Aaaah, so much more comfortable_. Lance’s bayard shifted back into its dormant state. His eyes shut.

 

       Blazing indigo flashed beneath his eyelids.

 

        _Shit._

 

       His eyes snapped open. Lance waited with bated breath. For what, exactly, he couldn’t be too sure. Outside of a pain worse than hellfire, it was never really explained to him.

 

       Lance let out a sigh of relief when nothing happened. Hopefully, it hadn’t set in yet. The quiet slide of the training room entrance had him practically jump out of his skin, however.

 

       “Oh, Lance, what are you doing on the floor? Did you get quiznaked by the gladiator again?” Allura called out, a humored smile obvious in her tone. Lance growled tiredly and thought about flipping her off.

 

       “You wound me, princess,” and then he rolled over, sitting up with his hand held out and kneeling on one knee. “Oh, how it hurts to have such words thrown at me! It’s as if,” he dramatically fell to the floor once more and stuck his leg straight up, “I’m a quiznaking sniper and not a melee fighter.” His flat tone had Allura holding a fist to her mouth to stifle her laughter. Lance grinned.

 

       “Oh get up and go shower. You smell like a delvin macreote just before mating season.” She swiped at the air as if she could actually smell his sweat. She probably could. Which was pretty gross if he thought about it.

 

       Lance immediately stood. His bayard had already dematerialized back into his armor, which left his hands free while he stretched his tired muscles. And with bones popping and an embarrassingly out of context sexual moan, he grinned back at the princess.

 

       “That was both unnecessary and uncalled for and you know it, paladin.” Except she only raised a perfectly trimmed brow, arms now crossed. Lance winked and stuck his tongue out.

 

       “You’re falling into old habits again there, princess. You’re a paladin too.”

  


\--

 

 

 

I don’t know how it started. This… Keith thing. One moment we were fighting and the next he was one of the most beautiful things in the universe I’d ever seen. And that made him leaving Voltron even worse. I was tired and I couldn’t even be angry at him anymore for choosing the Blade over Voltron every time.

 

 

But watching him go through those doors a second time just... it _hurt_ . It hurt more than I would’ve liked. Still does, not that I’d actually tell him. Because then I’d have to tell him _why_ and I’m not ready to think about that yet.

 

 

I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to think about it.

 

 

\--

  


       He couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t sleep through the feeling of heat coursing through his body, through the sweat pouring from him, through the insatiable burn in his lungs. Tossing his blanket off and yanking Pidge’s headphones from his head, Lance stood to try and get his bearings. Black hair flashed in his closed eyes and he experienced what he could only describe as literal hellfire tearing through him.

 

       He fell to his knees. Clutching his chest with one hand, he covered his mouth with the other. Deep breaths, Lance. Deep breaths. It burned so much.

  
       Tears dripped from his eyes and onto the floor. Lance felt sick. Through the searing heat, he felt the thorns of roses brush against his lungs. Those thorns stole his breath away with each tiny brush. But in his struggle to keep calm (fuck, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna _die-_ ) he only made things worse.

 

       Bile rose in his throat, and in his windpipe he felt the telltale tickle of petals making their way up. His mother told him their curse was a death sentence. There was no way to fix it unless the one you loved would love you back. He’d been so _careful_.

  
_The pods_. He needed to get to a pod. Otherwise, someone would find him passed out in his own room from coughing up stomach acid and fucking flowers. God, it hurt to breath so much. But he needed to stand and get to the infirmary.

 

       His first attempt at standing was unsuccessful and only made him throw up. He cringed, but at least his breathing was just that much easier. With the petals out of his throat, even if they burned just as much as stomach acid, he was able to take a full breath. The thorns still brushing his lungs felt like hundreds of pinpricks laced with their own acid. But that didn’t stop him.

  
       Now, his second attempt to stand was much more successful. Hands on his knees, he made to take a single deep breath. And then he stood straight. With exhausted determination, Lance made his way out of his room (obviously avoiding the mess on his floor that he’d have to clean up eventually) and towards the infirmary. He’d make it. He had to. _He had to_.

 

       Each step felt horrible. With fever burn searing his limbs he had a hard time keeping himself upright. A hand came to the wall and Lance pushed himself forward. He wouldn’t let his death sentence take him so quickly like it had parts of his family. He wouldn’t be taken victim just because he had more than a crush on his former rival.

 

       “Lance?” _Quiznak_.

 

       “Heeeeey princess. What brings you here so late at night?” He turned and leaned on the wall as if he wasn’t struggling to keep himself both upright and breathing. More petals tickled his throat.

 

       “What in Altea are you doing up so late? Your human sleep cycle isn’t finished.” Of course she wouldn’t be so swayed by his disarmingly gorgeous looks. His disheveled hair would make even the hardest eggs crack, but Allura was simply out of his league. He obviously needed to work on his lines if he wanted to get out of this.

 

       “Oh, you know, just takin’ a walk-” His lungs spasmed and he doubled over. Lance coughed wet and hard, and if he were able to look up he’d see Allura’s near horrified expression. But he certainly felt her hands on his back and forehead. Ahhhh her hands were so comfortably cold on his skin…

 

       “Oh dear. I- I should get Coran. He can help.” He froze for a second and then grabbed at her before she could stand again. The coughing spell ended, though he kept his hand on his mouth. He felt more petals and some sort of wetness in his palm; quite frankly, he didn’t want to know what was actually there in case it was blood.

 

       Lance shook his head and only held on tighter when she tried to reason with him. “Lance please, you need help.” But he only shook his head again, faster this time. Allura bit her lip. She looked like she wanted to debate further but then thought better of it. He could be just as stubborn as her if he tried to be. “Oh quiznak it all.”

 

       She grabbed his free arm and wrapped it around her shoulders. “Let’s get you to a pod then. We _will_ be talking about this when you get out though.” And then she was helping him stand. Each step they took together felt like an eternity, even if it was truly only a few moments. For the most part, Lance kept his eyes closed. He concentrated on breathing through his nose, on Allura holding him upright, on anything other than the plants inside him or the man that caused them to be there. Being suffocated by flowers was not the way he wanted to go.

 

       When they’d made it inside the infirmary, Allura rushed to set him down by an empty pod. He could hear her mumbling something about benches or beds, but he didn’t really care. The floor was just as nice at this point. Slowly, he finally moved his hand away from his mouth. Hopefully, Allura would miss him cringing, because of course there was blood and phlegm covering the petals in his palm. Clenching his hand into a fist, he looked back up to Allura when she called out his name.

 

       “I’m setting up the pod now. You don’t look like you can get yourself undressed and Coran’s not here to do it for you, so you’ll be going in just as you are.” He nodded and almost stood, but when she raised her hand to stop him, he sat still. “Don’t. Let me.”

 

       “... Okay.”

 

\--

  


 

Flowers are wonderful things. They come in so many different sizes, shapes, colors; they’re simply amazing. But some flowers were dangerous.

 

 

Well, any flower was dangerous if it started growing in your damn lungs.

  


\--

  


       He felt more than saw the pod open back up. Lance took a deep breath. They were still there. But the damage from before was most likely gone. He no longer felt sick to his stomach, and he wasn’t sweating up a storm. As he stepped out, he felt narrow hands grasp at his arms. And when he opened his eyes, he saw blue much brighter than his own… and much more angry.

 

       “Oh no.”

 

       “Oh no _is right_. What the quiznak was that? You have flowers growing inside you!” Ah. Right to the point then. Lance pushed himself away from the shorter woman and cringed at the feeling of cold sweat sticking to him. Gross.

 

       “Can we talk after I’ve had a shower and cleaned up my room? I feel gross and the place probably stinks now.” But she waved him off.

 

       “Not until you tell me what’s going on. You were fine yesterday evening. What changed?” Great… He groaned and thought of his sister back home (You’re just like her. So bossy…) before moving to stretch his tired arms. Allura was in her paladin armor instead of her nightgown. How long was he asleep? “Everyone knows that you’re unfit for battle today, so I kept you in there for a little longer. I’m not having anyone go into battle if they’re sick.” Oh. Seems he said that out loud.

 

       “Oh.”

 

       “Yes, oh. Now talk.”

 

       “Fine, fine. Jeez, you’re pushy today…”

  
       “I watched you collapse, cough so hard you struggled to breathe, and practically carried you to a pod because you were apparently about to suffocate on _the flowers in your lungs_. Flowers that shouldn’t be there. So yes, I’m going to be ‘pushy’ as you call it.” She huffed and crossed her arms. A pedestal stood beside her, a graph of what looked to be a scan of his organs. Creepy.

 

       With the door to the pod closed up again, he was able to lean back against it. It felt uncomfortably cold on his sweat-drenched back. “You ever heard of family curses and things like that?” He took another deep breath, “Well, you see… that’s. That’s basically what’s going on right now. Some ancestor of mine was a jerk and made a witch _really angry_ so now my family has to deal with the ancient rage of a heartbroken woman. Don’t look at me like that Allura, I’m not lying.

 

       “It’s. How do I explain this… Basically, my family has to be super careful with our emotions. Unrequited emotions are something we try to avoid because our little curse is basically a death sentence for us.” Lance felt uncomfortable talking about his family’s secret. Saying that you’re dealing with the aftereffects of hundreds of years of postmortem rage wasn’t really something you told people. Not unless you wanted to be looked at funny.

 

       “So, you’re telling me that you have flowers in your lungs because of a so-called curse.”

 

       “Yeup.”

 

       “That… Alright, I’ll give you that. I’ve heard stranger things.” And then she shrugged and Lance felt a weight lift from his chest. “But now you have to tell me who these feelings are aimed at. A death sentence for love isn’t something you take lightly.” He must have made a face because Allura put a hand on her hip and gave him a ‘don’t test me’ look.

 

       “Okay, okay! Fine, jeez… Look okay I kinda sorta maybe _reallylikeKeithpleasedon’ttellanyone-!_ ”

 

       “... Oh.”

  
       “Yeah. That’s a big _oh_ alright.” Lance hunched in on himself. Allura sighed and he glared at the floor. Stupid curses, stupid feelings… He didn’t want any of it.

 

       A hand knocked at his head lightly. Looking back at the other paladin, he startled at the determination running through Allura’s eyes. It made him uncomfortable to see her so worked up over something she couldn’t change. “If you’re wondering if this will affect the coalition, I’ll make sure it doesn-”

 

       “No. We’re going to fix it. I don’t know how yet, but I won’t lose another paladin,” Lance couldn’t imagine what was going through the princess’ mind, but if he knew anything about her now, it was that she was one of the most stubborn people he knew. Her refusal to trust Lotor until he’d actually killed his own father could attest to that. “Now go shower and get some rest. We’re letting the Marmora scout for us for the next few days while we take a break. We all seem to need one at this point.” She smiled at him.

 

       He might have cried a little.


	2. 2

       Lance practically tore his helmet off in frustration. In the days since they’d had their little break, his little ‘problem’ flared two other times and nearly forced him into a pod again. Allura, with all her diplomatic ability, could only do so much before they were all forced back into the lions to fight for their lives. He could feel that stupid tickle against his throat and coughed into his hand.

 

       Two burgundy rose petals. Ughhhhh he hated feeling like this! Gagging quietly he crushed them before dropping them into a small garbage chute by his foot. Shiro’s voice brought him out of his head.

 

       “Lance, what happened? You weren’t yourself during battle.” Hah, what did that mean anyway?

       “It’s nothing, boss man. Still a little under the weather I guess.”

       “Get Coran to check then. We can’t have you falling behind as our sharpshooter, can we?”

       “... Yes sir.” On a private channel, he buzzed Allura.

       “Yes, Lance?” her lilting voice gave him something in terms of comfort and he was ever grateful for it.

       “You heard him. Gotta get a checkup from Coran. How do I hide my little secret from him?” He leaned back fully and crossed his arms. Red, probably like all the other lions, had an autopilot function that he decided to take full advantage of. He felt the exhaustion of the day begin to seep into his bones and almost slumped. Not yet, Lance. Not yet.

       “Lance, you really should tell him. You are his favorite, you know.”

       “Yeah and be subjected to another round of interrogation? I already got that from you, princess. I’m not up for it again no matter how stubborn the two of you get.” And he wasn’t lying. If he could avoid being asked questions about why he was growing flowers in his lungs like some high school kid’s fanfiction fantasy, he absolutely would. Allura frowned at him in her little screen.

 

       “He was my father’s advisor before he was mine. He might know something about at least helping you. Give us a place to start.” And there was that reminder that she’d try to ‘fix’ him. He guessed being part of a hyper-advanced society of magical space people did that to you. Ah, to be intelligent…

  
       “Allura…” Maybe she was right. Maybe he didn’t want to fucking die because of something his ancestor did to one person back in the day. But it was something he’d accepted; even if they were able to lift the curse from him specifically, who was he to ignore the rest of his family. They were forced to deal with it just as he was and  _ maybe _ he wasn’t one for leaving his family to rot. “I’m sorry. I just. I can’t. What about the rest of my family?

 

       “Even if we found something, it’s not like we could just fly back to Earth just to fix it for literally everyone I could be related to. This thing goes back multiple generations and that’s just too many people. I’m not letting myself be the only one freed. I can’t do that to my family.” By then, Red had landed and settled into a dormant state. Lance closed his eyes. Keith flashed in his mind and the vines in his lungs shifted just slightly, making him tense. He couldn’t have the lingering Galra factions, or even Haggar and her cronies, following them and threatening his home planet just for a curse.

       “... Alright. I’ll see what I can do then.” The private channel closed.

 

 

\--

  
  


I remember my  _ Tía _  Verita reading diaries from my great grandmother and crying. I was never allowed to read them, but often, when she would babysit me while my brother and sister were at soccer practice, she would bring them with her to read while I slept. She never knew that I knew she cried reading them. When I asked mama, she always looked at me funny. You don’t want to know, my little Lancito. Go play with your siblings.

I still wonder what they said though.

  
  


\--

 

 

       Sure, Allura said she’d do what she could to help him keep his secret, but he wasn’t exactly expecting… this. Soon after he’d exited Red, Coran picked him up to go to the infirmary. He and the elder man had almost made it to their destination (“So, my boy, what happened during your last stay in the pods?”) when Allura appeared and, he guessed, physically dragged Coran away with her. Something about the mice chewing through some wiring that connected the crystal to the castle.

 

       “Um. Okay. Guess I’ll… see Coran later then.” with an internal sigh of relief, he turned to head towards the showers, only to bump into the large torso of one Galra emperor. When did-?

 

       “Allura requested I assist you in some matter relating to Altean history. She gave me directions to the castle’s library so… Why are you staring at me like that?” Lotor blinked down at him with a raised eyebrow. Lance looked away quickly, feigning ignorance.

  
       “No idea what you mean, Lotes. You’re just. A lot taller this close.” Yeah, yeah that would work. No way he’d let the young emperor know he was internally ranting at Allura for dragging someone else into this mess when he’s specifically asked for her  _ not _ to. Thank you, Allura. Thank you  _ so _ much. Lotor nodded ever so slowly, not a bit convinced by his obvious lie.

 

       “Uh-huh. My father’s genetics do make me on the taller side considering my mother’s heritage. So shall we?” he held out a hand to the elevator at the end of the hall, past the infirmary. Thank you based Lotor. His underarmor was uncomfortably sweaty, but it was something he’d deal with after his trip to the castle library.

       Lance followed Lotor down the hall and into the elevator. And in the silence between them, the brunet felt the awkward tug to talk. Talk about anything? Nothing? Their last mission?  _ Keith _ ? Actually no, not Keith, that would be disastrous-

       “Are you… alright? It looked like you were distracted during battle.” Oh thank god he didn’t have to start the conversation.

 

       “I’ve just been a little under the weather lately. Stress and all that.” He shrugged, a dorky smile falling into his expression. He needed to get his head in order at least during missions. People started asking questions when he didn’t, and right now he really needed them to  _ not ask questions _ . Lotor looked down at him from his side.

       “Alright. Then why are we going to the library for research when what you should be doing is resting?”  _ Oh quiznak _ . Observant little bastard…

       “No comment.”

       “Alright.” And then the elevator opened. Lance stepped out first and noted the different architecture. It looked older than the main decks.

 

       “So-”

       “This area of the castle was built for Allura’s mother apparently. Unlike her husband’s alchemy studies, Altea’s queen was more of a historian. All of her personal research should be in the rooms on this hall.” Oh. Well alright then. So there wasn’t just one library to go through.

       “So I guess we have the clearance to go through all of the rooms then?”

       “Correct. Where do you want to start?” They turned to each other. Lance didn’t like being told to decide these kinds of things.

       “Uhhhh, pick a number between one and six.”

       “Five.”

       “Then we’ll start on the furthest door to the right.”

 

 

\--

 

Apparently, the type of flower that kills you is completely random, although roses are quite common in my direct family line. Mama still fears camellias because of her own run-in with the curse. She was lucky that those feelings ended up being returned in the end, but to this day she refuses to look at flowers with anything other than anxious acceptance.

Burgundy roses seem kind of fitting for me though. To be killed by something that means deep, deep love and passion sounds romantic almost. It’s not, but from the outside, it sounds like something out of a storybook.

I don’t want to die afraid of flowers.

 

\--

 

 

       “What exactly are you looking for?” Lance looked up from his arm. Lotor was carrying three more journals in one hand, the other sitting on his hip. The translator in his arm guard paused its scan of the book on his lap (thank you Pidge for your brilliant upgrades…) and he leaned back against the bookshelf.

 

       “Anything pertaining to cultures heavy on medical advancement. The pods can’t heal everything, and diplomatic relationships with people that can give us medicine would be… so appreciated.” Lance sat back up and continued his work. Lotor quietly set down the books in his hand before sitting across from him.

       “I see. Have you found anything? Now that I know what to look for, I can assist you.”

       “... Sure. If you want to. I know you’re probably bored just watching me look at old books.” But contrary to what he thought, Lotor practically brightened.

 

       “Oh no, of course not! My mother Honerva was an alchemist, so I grew up learning the beauty of research from her notes. You see- wait, why are you laughing?” He pouted and Lance let out another snicker from behind his hand.

       “No, no, it’s fine. I just thought about how you’re so similar to Pidge. She has an unquenchable thirst for knowledge just like you do. You light up just like she does.”

       Lotor looked back at him. He seemed unused to such conversation. It was kinda sad if Lance thought about it. He shook his head.

       “Thank you, though, for your help.”


End file.
